Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Graduation Day.

Finally. Today is the last day of our school. Went to school. With quite a down mood.. Our class is the most formal of all since we got a vid from Ms Yong. She didnt come since she's married yesterday night. CONGRATS TO MS YONG / MRS TSENG. THANKS FOR TEACHING US FOR THESE YEARS. WE WILL REMEMBER YOU FOREVER. ROCKS ON! Dont know why, i feel touch by all these, she specially on her wedding day record us a video specially for us. Maybe its im thinking how should i tell her stuff bah. So cant really get the right emotion. Then we went for a buffet.

I chat with her alot during that time. Understand her more.. But that might be the last time i will talk to her up so close le. Must know this, i wont care, bother or even feel anything if i dont love her soooo much.. If i dont love her so much, why will I care? People who know me well, should know i usually have heck care attitude de.. But towards her, i never once have this attitude. I try to do better and save the relationship whenever i can. Make it better.. She's really stressed up now, and im at fault for saying she dont care me that day when she's busy working. I know its my bad.. Am really regret.. I feel your pain. And i felt the pain myself.. But i do really hope she give me the chance to further understand. Maybe no chance le. But i just wanna voice all these out. Those which i cant really say infront of you and dont know how to tell you. I DO really care you de. But since start, this is my first ever serious relationship. So sometimes im really useless and dont know what to do. Im trying hard to do stuff which makes you happy and know i care.. But i guess i failed le bah. Maybe its the wrong way. But i will strive on and try again. I wont back down. Let me know her problems. I WILL share the pain with her. Since this is what true love is about. I wont back down from pain. I love her lots and am willing to do so. This is my first ever time loving someone so deep.. Seriously.. Any lies can just strike me to death.. She's now in a mess and she's making a decision whether to give up or not.. I really dont wanna think negative. So i will hope and pray that she give a positive answer and not a negative one. Chances are given by ourselves, not others. I do hope she will do the same. Even if something bad really happens, i will still care for her. Even its in the silence.. She might be leaving for LA soon.. But i do really hope, these last few months she give me the chance to make her memories sweet and memorable. I know im always emo and think too much in the past. I promise i wont ever do it again, as long as you share your problems with me. This will allow me to know you much better and more. I really do treasure those sweet memories you had given me and share with me. Its craved in my heart no matter what happens. Once its crafted, forever it will stay crafted. You might think this is all lies, but i swear it is not. What i stated here are all truth and facts coming from deep down my heart. Life still goes on no matter how stress. Relationship is just a side-track action. As long as you dont get affected by stress, im sure this relationship will be a good, meaningful and happy one, one which can let you forget the sadness. =) I will treasure it if you give me a chance. I will be there for you no matter what. Promise..

You might not read this at all. But this is all from my heart. Truth and facts. I dont know how to tell you upfront. Neither i wanna find someone else to say it to. So blogging is the only way to let it out. Fully out le.. Tomorrow is gonna be our 3 months le. Hope there will be more months ahead for us. And not end it on 3 months - 1 day relation.. I actually sort of gave up my usual gaming / zombie lifestyle and spent more time with you le. And even last time you say i always spent time with friends more than you, I also changed le. Mostly with you instead of friends. Even rejecting them to go out and spent time with you.. And i do whatever i can to not go too close to gals, preventing you from feeling jealous.. No matter what. I still want to thank you for accepting me and letting me be your stead.. Really thanks. For someone so useless like me, you accepted.. Seeing u so sad and teared, really pain me lots.. Please dont ever be sad again.. Sorry for being such a useless stead.. No matter what your answer will be, hope you will be happy bah ^^. =)

*[[ And they lived happily ever after... ]]*
|1:57:00 PM|

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